The Royal Family of Hell: Episode 1, A Match Made in…

Lucifer’s daughter is bringing her chosen mate home to meet Mom and Dad.  Who could it be?

Author’s Note:  This story was inspired by something one of my followers tweeted to me.  He used the phrase “royal family of Hell,” and it stuck.  I think we will see these characters again in a future post.

The room was hot. Of course it was; it was always hot in the Fiery Pit of Hell.

Lucifer paced. He was restless and irritable, as he had been since his youngest daughter had announced her courtship. It wasn’t that he was opposed to a young demon making his intent known; a good match would be highly useful. He was also unconcerned that it might be a bid for the Throne of Hell. Lucifer was immortal; any demon’s interest in taking his place was inconsequential. They all knew and properly loathed him, which was why they kept their place. No one had any serious intention of usurping his position.

The real reason for Lucifer’s disquiet was the fact that his daughter refused to tell him which demon she had ensnared. She had remained silent, and no amount of demanding, pleading, or wheedling would draw it out of her. It was both maddening and worrisome.

He suspected she had gotten herself involved with a junior demon far below her station as Princess of Hell and was appropriately ashamed to admit it. Of course, the match would be advantageous for the underling demon, as it would move him quickly up the ranks. But it was unbecoming for the daughter of someone of Lucifer’s stature. Why couldn’t she just have cooled her lust with him and been done with it? She could have moved on to a far more practical marriage. And Lucifer was nothing if not practical.

He felt a presence behind him and halted his groove-wearing. Turning around, he saw his wife in the doorway. He huffed at her.

“Hello to you, too,” Lilith snapped, shaking him out of his thoughts.

Ah, he loved it when she was snippy with him. It was almost enough to take the edge off his worry.

“You interrupted my wallowing,” he complained. “I was busy stewing in my frustration about Disharmonia.”

“Oh, that. What are you so upset about?”

“Only the fact that she won’t tell me who the demon is.” He eyed his wife carefully. “She didn’t say anything to you, did she?”

“Not a word. And believe me, I would have gotten it out of her if she weren’t so bent on keeping her secret. Unlike you, I have much more subtle ways of reaching her. Unfortunately, she didn’t cave.”

“She has five older siblings. Obviously they’ve taught her a thing or two.”

“Obviously.” Lilith strode into the room and draped herself on the settee. Her eyes followed Lucifer as he resumed his pacing. “She said she’s bringing him here tonight?”

“Yes.” Lucifer stopped again. He banged his fist against the stone wall, and it cracked a little. He grunted.

“I’m sure it’s nothing to concern yourself about. You’re working yourself into such a state, you won’t be able to torment anyone until long into the next Earth-month. You need to settle down.”

He glared at his wife. She might be beautiful, but she was equally infuriating as his wayward daughter. “How can you be so calm?”

“Because I was a young demon once too. This is her way of telling us she’s finally ready to stop chasing immature underlings and finally settle down with someone respectable. Don’t you remember how Discordant used to spend all his time fawning over those silly little things that could barely persuade a human to believe he couldn’t control his lust? Now he’s perfectly matched with the very same demoness who invented what the humans call ‘cyberbullying.’ They are an ideal pair, perfectly poised to cause as much strife as we could hope for.”

Lucifer only snarled. He knew Lilith was right. Disharmonia was at the perfect maturity to trade in her tail-chasing for an honorable marriage. It was more than likely that she was simply having a bit of entertainment over making her father distressed. He relaxed fractionally.

“About time, too,” he finally grumbled.

Lilith stretched and stood. Lucifer admired her form. He would have to spend several moments ravishing her later. He smirked as he ogled her rear end on its way to the door. She glanced over her shoulder, a coy smile playing at the corner of her lips. She couldn’t fool her husband, however; she was just as interested in the game as he was. After all, she was the one who had taught it to the humans.

“I’m on my way to find the others. Disharmonia asked me to make sure everyone was here when she arrived.” With a last subtle twitch of her hips, she disappeared around the corner.

It wasn’t long before Lilith returned, followed in succession by Disharmonia’s five brothers and sisters. Discordant was the most irritable of the group. He claimed to have been disturbed in the middle of important work. Lucifer knew better; Discordant had no current assignments. He chuckled to himself thinking about the more likely explanation for his newlywed son’s annoyance.

Dissentia, Dispersia, and Disruptia arrived together. This had been the case for as long as Lucifer could remember. All three of them enjoyed making a grand entrance, and together they were impressive even on an off-day. Lucifer wasn’t sure whether to pity or envy their mates.

Disturbant was the last to arrive. He really had been on an assignment. He blew in at the last second and, finding the seats all filled, leaned against the far wall with his arms and ankles crossed.

The whole family had assembled; now to wait for Disharmonia.

Once the initial greetings had passed, Lucifer and his family fell into an awkward silence. He knew his children were only interested in the proceedings because Disharmonia’s behavior had caused him such consternation. If it hadn’t been for that, he doubted any of them would have cared. Who their sister chose was of little importance to any of them. As long as it didn’t prevent their interference in the lives of humans, they couldn’t be bothered with the politics.

Just when the tension had reached fever pitch, the door swung open. Disharmonia looked in at her family, then stepped inside. She was alone.

Lucifer drew in his breath; the anticipation was destroying him. Or rather, it would have, if he had been destructible. “Well? Have you brought your mate to meet us?” he ground out through clenched teeth.

The cool confidence Lucifer had seen on his daughter’s face when she arrived now slid from her features. She fidgeted. “Ye—es,” she replied.

It was as he had feared. If Disharmonia had rejected the young underlings in favor of a more mature match, she would have brought him in immediately. She would have known that her parents would approve of any demon above the rank of Common Tormentor. Even a Tormentor would have sufficed if he had seniority. Lucifer caught Lilith’s eye and saw the surprise reflected there. She knew what he was thinking, and she was of the same mind.

“Where is he?” Dissentia demanded. “I’m not interested in waiting all night for this.”

Disharmonia hesitated. “Outside.”

Lilith took charge. “Bring him in. Now.”

Lucifer knew Disharmonia didn’t dare disobey her mother. Sure enough, she turned around immediately and disappeared from the room. When she returned, she was no longer alone. As soon as Disharmonia and her chosen mate entered, there was just enough time for Lucifer to register three things: His wife’s look of abject horror, Discordant’s yell of surprise, and a large pair of silvery, angelic wings.

And then, for the first and last time during his tenure in Hell, he fainted dead away.

©March 22, 2013 ABMitchell