I know that a lot of churches are trying to distance themselves from what they believe to be outdated Christian-ese. If you’ve been in the church long enough, you know exactly what I mean. Nowadays, you don’t hear many people talk about finding the Lord, having a burden, or sins of the flesh. If we’re honest, we realize that changes in church language are neither bad nor good; they are a reflection of the era. In today’s church, we might speak of making a decision to follow Christ, being concerned, or acting against God’s will. They mean the same thing as the older versions, but the language is more plain.
On the flip side, however, is a batch of really, really annoying Christian buzz words and phrases. Here is my Top Ten list of The Most Cringe-Worthy Contemporary Christian Phrases:
10. Christ-Follower. It’s not bad, but what’s wrong with being a Christian? Are we that afraid that what we call ourselves is going to offend someone? Sorry, people, it’s how we act that offends people. And yes, there is research to back that up.
9. What Would Jesus Do? I don’t hate the sentiment. I think it’s great to try to figure out what Jesus would do. However, it’s over-used (yes, still) and often has more to do with personal morality than anything else. If you want to go that route, a better question is, “What would Paul do?” Jesus was a lot more about focusing on others than ourselves.
8. It’s not a religion, it’s a relationship. Guess what? Like it or not, Christianity is a religion. And do your homework, it’s not the only religion to promote relationship with our Creator.
7. It’s all part of God’s plan. Arrghhh! No, God did not send your life-threatening illness to teach you some kind of lesson. I do believe God can use our situations, but He doesn’t cause harmful things to happen in order that the Cosmos be set right 5 years in the future.
6. T-shirts with Christian versions of famous products. I know, not a buzz word, but still silly. Ick.
5. God said it, I believe it, that settles it. Oh, really? Well, thank you for that well-reasoned argument.
4. God hates f*gs. Yeah, it’s mostly Westboro Baptist that’s responsible for this little nasty. Still, thanks for sharing. I wasn’t aware of that. Guess I have to revise my image of God. Excuse me while I pray that God gives me the strength not to punch you in the head.
3. I don’t feel led. Maybe not, but I get the impression this one has more to do with what one personally does not want to do than with what one is not being told to do by God. Be honest with me, tell me if you don’t want to do something. It won’t hurt my feelings.
2. “Just…” People say this one in prayer A LOT. It’s annoying. It minimizes the need for which you are praying. “Just” stop it already.
1. Love on. Okay, I saved the worst for last. I hate, hate, hate, HATE this expression. You cannot “love on” someone unless you are sitting on him, which I do not recommend at church. (Um, on second thought, there may be other ways to “love on” someone, but they are not family friendly.) I want to scream every time I hear this phrase. It really is alright to simply love people (not to mention grammatically correct). I have a theory on the origins of this one…hm, I sense another post in the future.
What phrases send you screaming from the room?
