My links round-up is focused on responses to that lapse-in-judgment post shaming braless teenage girls for making boys think dirty thoughts. There were lots of other things I liked this week, but due to time constraints and the fact that I had a doctor mining in my vagina this morning*, I won’t be posting them today. You’ll just have to trust me that the Internet is actually cool enough to contain stuff better than one mom’s slut-shaming post.
FYI – a letter to my sons This is just so beautiful, and it’s exactly what I’ve said to my kids.
JGR: FYI (if you’re a slut-shaming facebook stalking mother) Another witty, sarcastic reply that hits all the right notes about what’s wrong.
FYI (A Letter to My Daughter Sally) Best line: “And to be perfectly honest, I’m not actually primarily talking about teenage boys you will come in contact with, whom I suspect you will find much less hung up on your clothing choices than some would have you think.”
FYI (If You’re a Teenage Boy) This is probably my favorite response, but I say “probably” because there were so many good ones. This was the one that made me laugh hardest, though.
Our bodies, ourselves I’ve been reading Sarah’s blog for a while, and I especially love her stories about her “shorties.” From one mom to another, well said!
RE: FYI (If You’re a Teenage Girl) Yet again, witty and hilarious. The whole last paragraph is great, but especially this: “What I’m trying to say is that I don’t respect nor trust my sons, or men in general. For that matter, I don’t trust females either. I think that men are mindless slaves to their genitals, incapable of compassion, or reasoned decision-making.”
Dear Kim: My Son Is Not an Animal, and My Daughter Is Responsible for No One’s Sexuality But Her Own This one is more serious, but what I liked best is where she says that she will talk to her own children rather than everyone else’s.
We Can Do Better I don’t totally agree with this (there’s a little bit of slut-shaming in it, though Jen acknowledges this in a self-deprecating and humorous way). But I do agree that it’s bizarre how boys and men have become charity cases when it comes to those tempting boobies.
Sexy Selfies: No Cause for Teen Shaming This is an excellent post on growing up, respect, and whether or not teens will regret their choices.
Dear Random Children of the Internet with Blogging Moms Best line, on promising not to write open letters to her children: “I realize it will just make me look judgy and kind of ridiculous and would in reality have absolutely nothing to do with actually communicating with or parenting you.”
A response to Mrs. Hall: Teaching our boys respect and self-control Like the previous link, this one was shared in the comments on my “FYI” post. She directs the burden back to exactly where it belongs–on boys to exercise restraint and on parents to teach them how.
FYI: An Open Letter to Teenage Girls Who Don’t Always Wear a Bra This one identifies a key premise of religiously-based slut-shaming: adult fear of adolescent sexuality. Right on.
Have a fantastic weekend, everyone! I’m off to enjoy one last hurrah before the school year really takes off. I’ll see you all on Monday for another installment of Fifty Shades of Hell.
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*Why are we so afraid to be honest about what goes on at the gynecologist? I mean, it’s not like that old SNL sketch about the Ladies’ Room. It’s an exam table and a cold piece of metal. It kinda sucks (unless you like that sort of thing). And for some weird reason, we whisper about it like that one family “incident” no one ever mentions, as though fully half of us don’t have plumbing that needs to be kept in working order.
Rebecca Hains
Thanks for the pingback and the great round-up!
Amy
You’re welcome! 🙂
erinrebecca
Thanks for all the links! They will be my reward for finishing my homework.
With regards to the quote at the end . . . one of the things I love most about being in a mostly female MPH program is that EVERYBODY talks about what happens at the gynecologist. Also our periods. Also sex. When I hang out with non-school people, I have to remind myself what the “rules” of normal conversation are. (Bodily functions: no. Disease statistics: no. Feminist theory: maybe.)
Amy
Ha! Bodily functions: Normal dinner conversation with 8- and 10-year-olds. Someday, my kids will hate me for this, but they can talk about this stuff totally straight-faced *and* cracking jokes. I pity their own future children.
queenofthecouch
Thanks for the mention! I’ve read most of these but you’ve given me a couple more that I hadn’t yet seen. Great roundup!
Amy
Awesome! There are several links floating around with round-ups, but these were my own favorites.