A.M. Leibowitz

queer slice-of-life stories

Notable News

Notable News: Week of February 23-March 1, 2013

Blogs, Cool Stuff, Faith and Spirituality, Feminism, Links, Women

What a great week it’s been.  I have been honored and thrilled to participate in the feminisms link-up and be included with some of my favorite bloggers.  Today I’m highlighting the best of what I’ve seen this week.

1. On the Body and Blood

There’s a lot of my spiritual past I still have to sort through, even as it relates to women in the Church. It’s not all so tidy, but it does mean that when I approached the rail for the first time to receive the Eucharist, it was the most unconsciously natural thing for there to be a woman with the Body and Blood in her hands, just as a woman held the Body and Blood two thousand years ago.  [“feminism & me, whether i knew it or not,” Antonia Terrazas]

2. On (literal) bra-burning

Those scraps of fabric finally started burning well, the polyester fibers casting out light and all of our bold pronouncements at the injustice of the world. We stared for a brief moment at our success.

The flames blossomed.

“Oh my gosh!” someone shrieked. “THE TRASH CAN IS ON FIRE!”  [“The Fires of Feminism,” Emily Maynard]

3. On not being half

I was angriest that day because a boy had said out loud what I’m always afraid men are thinking.

That, as a woman in the church, I am by very nature a HALF.

Half a heart. Half a body. Half a purpose.  [“today i embark on an expedition to take back my personhood,” Jesus Gypsy]

4. On needing femimism

This is how I feel. When someone asks me why I believe inequality exists, I want to scream, “Why do I believe you exist? You’re standing right in front of me!”

So actually, Christian church, you need feminism like the dying need a tourniquet. But I need your attitude like a fish needs a bicycle.  [“What I Learned: Like a fish needs a bicycle,” Emily Joy Allison]

5. On being a feminist for our sons, too

I’m a feminist because I want my son to see all people as valuable human beings, created in God’s image. I want him to reject culturally constructed ideas about what it means to be “masculine” or “feminine” and to embrace biblical truth about what it means to be human, male and female, created in teh image of a loving God.  [“for my son,” Amy at Making All Things New]

6. On the control of women’s bodies

everything about my mother’s experience tells me a story about someone else deciding what women should do with their bodies. It tells me about dangerous assumptions and naive women and sickness being passed from one generation to the next, daughters without mothers and mothers without daughters.  [“FemFest : My Daughter’s Body,” Bethany Suckrow]

7. On love and justice

But I agree with hooks that there can be no love without justice. Where unfairness, inequality, abuse, disrespect, victim-blaming, and rape exist, there is no love.

And feminism is one movement that fights for justice for women.  [“Feminisms Fest: I need feminism because there is no love without justice,” Sarah Moon]

8. On taking ownership of misogyny and healing the hidden wound

We hear sermons telling women their only place in this world is the home. We buy toys that are deliberately designated for either boys or girls. We see movies that portray women as one-dimensional manic pixie dream girls who’s only mission in life is to rescue “sensitive” moody guys from their self pity.  [“FemFest: The Other Hidden Wound,” Travis Mamone]

9. On speaking blessings over the feminist women and men of faith

So, I’m bending the rules a little bit. Next week I’ll probably do my own wrap-up, as well as a list of contributions that I thought were particularly helpful or well-done. In the meantime, I’m going to write something that’s on my heart: I want to speak a blessing over everyone who has participated this week. [“People of Valor,” Shaney Irene]

10. On places where you can read more
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Notable News: Week of February 16-22, 2013

Cool Stuff, Links, News, Odds 'n' Ends

I have been highly entertained this week, thanks to an old Saturday Night Live video and the #rickwarrentips Twitter meme.  Of course, there were other good things this week as well.

1. On anger, Young Life camp, and love

Registered Runaway is one of my favorite bloggers.  Three(!) posts grabbed my attention this week:

The Importance of Getting Angry

But maybe, if just for a spell, it can be the splash of water our hearts desperately need. Maybe sometimes, we’re just not angry enough. Maybe growth isn’t possible until we scorch the earth.

Same Sex Couples and Smokers Rock

When condoning and encouraging the illegal use (we were all under 18) of a harmful substance is okay, but two girls holding hands is a conflict of faith, you know there is something wrong with evangelicalism.

Love is an Ability

I am convinced that saying you love someone doesn’t count as love. I am also convinced that willing your mind to love someone that you’ve never reached out and touched, doesn’t add up to much.

Actually, you should probably just go subscribe to the blog.

2. On the rape of Bathsheba

Two great posts on the subject of David and Bathsheba highlight the skewed way in which contemporary conservative Christianity views womanhood and consent.  Sarah Moon talks a little about her work on Christian dating books and recalls an appalling bit of dialogue from a Mother’s Day production in which she participated.  Crystal S. Lewis breaks down the differences in two different commentaries on the story of David and Bathsheba and how the perception of “inviting rape” continues to permeate modern culture.

3. On Rick Warren, memes, and tweets gone horribly awry

The whole thing started with this tweet:

New churches: Buy land as soon as you can but delay building for as long as you can. Cant explain all the reasons here.

I have no idea whether all the retweets and favorites came before or after the meme started, but the above tweet sparked a days-long series of #rickwarrentips that all feature the phrase “Can’t explain all the reasons here.”  For your entertainment, I’ve compiled my favorites into a Storify page.  You can also read Tony Jones’ explanation (once the servers are functioning again; I’m assuming that there is a high traffic volume at the moment).  Even Rick Warren himself got in on the fun with a few tweets bearing the hashtag.

4. On the culture of applause

Here’s the YouTube video of the SNL sketch I mentioned above.  Yes, it’s old-ish; my excuse is that I don’t watch SNL anymore.  Heck, I don’t watch any television anymore, other than the occasional episode of Phineas and Ferb or My Little Pony with my kids.  Anyway, enjoy.  It’s safe for work and/or children.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gSjLiQxEZlM]

5. On my other blog

This week’s story was inspired by a tweet.  Any resemblance between the characters and persons living or dead is purely coincidental.

6. On poetry and ebooks

Several of my fellow writers are sending submissions for a poetry ebook.  If you write poetry and are interested in contributing (you know who you are), here is the submission form.

Have a great weekend!

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Notable News: Week of February 9-15, 2013

Cool Stuff, Links, News

Apparently, the theme of sexual ethics has carried over from last week.  There have been a lot of great responses.  These are some of my favorites.

1. On virginity

Joy Bennett has three great pieces on the subject, and it looks like there’s more forthcoming:

2. On “Biblical clarity”

Preston Yancey gives a great summary of the problems that arise from reducing sexual ethics to a list of Bible verses we can commit to memory.

3. On what’s missing

Slacktivist offers the perspective that the purity movement has failed to produce anything like a sexual ethic, only a sexual rule (“NO!”).

Evangelical purity culture and its attendant cult of “modesty” enthrones male lust, inverting what Jesus taught us. “If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away,” Jesus said. But purity culture says male eyes are inviolable, so if a man’s eye causes him to sin, then women’s bodies must be torn out and thrown away — or at least covered up and shut away. Modesty somehow always means women in burkas,* never men in blindfolds.

4. On sin and consent

Two more great pieces by Dianna Anderson:

We spend so much effort and energy telling people to say “no” that we’ve not equipped them with how to say “yes.”

A healthy sexual relationship has much more room to happen when everyone involved is doing so enthusiastically and with full knowledge and agreement about boundaries.

In unrelated news, here are two more posts this week you may enjoy:

5. On seasonal depression

Registered Runaway offers some good ideas for how to cope with winter depression.  If, like many of us, you are suffering, you don’t have to do it alone.

6. On Valentine’s Day

In case you don’t follow my other blog, here’s this weeks short story.

Have a great weekend, everyone.  See you back here on Monday!

 

 

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Notable News: Week of February 2-8, 2013

Links, News

This week was full of great posts about the Super Bowl, sex, and sex and the Super Bowl.  What more could a person ask for?

1. On objectifying language

Dianna Anderson does a great job summarizing the problems with the use of words and images that reduce women’s existence to that of male plaything.  She says,

The message we’re continually bombarded with is “women exist not for themselves but for the pleasure of men.” It’s the definitive male gaze.

I usually suggest staying away from the comments on blog posts unless one wants to either experience rage or contribute constructively, but in this case, go ahead and read them.  There’s more good stuff in there.

2. On objectifying ourselves

Sarah Moon does a phenomenal job of explaining the difference between women as objects to sell products and women dressing (and performing) in ways that make us feel empowered.  Best quotes:

Men are often seen as more human, as REAL men when they are sexual, while women are accused of objectifying themselves.

Objectification does not happen when a woman like Beyoncé decides to use her sexuality to be powerful. Objectification happens when Audi commercials show a teenaged boy kissing a teenaged girl without her permission and displaying that as bravery.

Amen and amen, Sarah.

3. On Beyoncé’s performance

I saw a boatload of Facebook statuses and tweets about how inappropriate Beyoncé was during her halftime performance.  But I saw just as many great blog posts defending her.  Here are some of the best:

4. On “impromptu sex week”

I’m borrowing the term from something Preston Yancey tweeted last night in the process of collecting various blog posts on the subject.  (Not to mention the fact that, well, that honestly just sounds pretty good in general, doesn’t it?)  In addition to Preston’s own two posts on purity culture and virginity, as well as the ones I linked in last week’s news, there have been several other good ones:

And of course, my own 3 posts this week on masturbation, two of which were linked by Slacktivist in this post (a nice summary of the purity culture posts over the last couple of weeks).

5. On my other blog

I started a second blog, because this one just isn’t the place for fiction.  But I write some of that, too, so I thought, Why not?  The plan is to put something new up there about once a week.  There are three this week, because I just started it last Saturday.  You can read the introductory post, my first story, and my guest post for Tim Gallen on there.  Be sure to check out the page for guest posts, because I would love to feature your writing!

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Notable News: Week of January 26-February 1, 2013

Cool Stuff, Links, News

Happy February, everyone!  There is thick, fluffy snow coming down outside my window as I put this post together.  What’s the weather like where you are?

Here’s this week’s round-up of the great and not-so-great.

1. On Mark Driscoll

This post is a great summary of what is wrong when a leader crosses a line.  I won’t stop posting, linking, and re-blogging until people wake up and stop following this man just because they think he has a few good things to say.  His behavior–and many of his words–are inexcusable.

2. On being a scandal

Have I mentioned lately that I love Registered Runaway’s blog?  Probably, but it bears mentioning again.  I loved this post, I am a Scandal in the Evangelical Conscience.  We all have different circumstances, but I think many of us can relate to being square pegs in the church–especially when it comes to things that are easily attached to guilt and shame.  How many of us are there who hid (or are hiding) in the shadows, afraid that something is fundamentally wrong with us?

3. On being thin

Trigger warning: disordered eating.  This is a heart-wrenching and vivid piece on the way we see ourselves.  Although I have never been diagnosed or treated for an eating disorder, I have had a life-long struggle to accept my body.  I can’t think of even one single woman in my life who hasn’t fixated on her weight in one way or another.  Haven’t we done enough damage?  It’s time for it to stop.

4. On refusing to be silent

Women are often told that the best way to stop misogyny is to ignore it and not engage with it.   But when we speak against the systems that marginalize and degrade people, we are not “fighting hate with hate.”  We are not yet on a level playing field.  We need to point it out so that people know what misogyny is and what it does.  Read through the #silentnomore tweets for more courageous women speaking up and for more examples of how women are bullied online just for being women.

5. On how women are not a monolith

I love this, because as a woman I struggle much more to write believable women than men.  I can’t explain why this is other than perhaps the cultural ingraining of men as the default.  The thing is, though, I know some men who write absolutely wonderful, strong women who embody real feminism to me.  So why can’t I do it?  I don’ t know.  Possibly a deeper question to ask is, why do I enjoy writing from a male perspective?  It might not be a simple matter of being able to write better women but wanting to write them.

6. On labeling writers

And speaking of a similar subject, this is a great post by Andi Cumbo on how who we are informs our writing but doesn’t define it.  I love this, because I have long struggled with the ways in which I’ve felt confined by the expectations that I should write a certain way because of my faith.  It’s freeing to know that the things I value most–equity, generosity, kindness, justice–can be as much a part of my writing as they are a part of my faith journey without having to be couched in religiosity.

7. On being damaged goods

Sarah Bessey is just marvelous, and this post is no exception.  This is what freedom and grace look like.  For anyone struggling today, I urge you to read this with an open heart and let her words wash over you.

8. On TMI

Be sure to click the links in this post by Fred Clark.  They are well worth the time it will take to read them.  I usually suggest people avoid the comments sections, but this comment on John Shore’s blog (linked in Fred’s post) says it all when it comes to “differences of opinion”:

It’s not about a difference of opinion on a level playing field but about you having the right to live a fully expressed life while denying me the right to do the same.

9. On getting creative in the winter

Just for fun, here’s a link from last Thursday.  I can only imagine what would happen if such a sculpture appeared in my neighborhood.

Have a great weekend, everyone!

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Notable News: Week of January 19-25, 2013

Cool Stuff, Links, News, Odds 'n' Ends

It’s been an interesting week, to say the least.  There’s been lots of conversation around how we should approach the public content of church leaders, but there’s also been a lot of great stuff on other subjects as well.  I hope you’ll take the time to read through these fantastic posts.

1. The post that started the conversation

I linked to it in my post yesterday when I responded, but here is the original post by Lore Ferguson on not being part of Mark Driscoll’s church.  As several people pointed out, the post itself is subtly pushy, but the comments are by far the worst part.  The good news is that it opened the door for people to be honest about the experiences they have had in abusive churches.

2. Sarah Moon on being angry

It is so good to have people saying this.  I can’t stress enough how important it is to speak the feelings we have.  It is not in the feelings that we lose ourselves, but in the suppression and unhealthy expression of them.  A lot of us need a lifetime to learn the difference.  Keep speaking up, Sarah, because so many of us are being affirmed by your words!

3. Luke Harms on platforms

I often feel this way.  How do I balance speaking up about the important things and just making more white noise?  As a writer, I take words very seriously–my own and others’.  Luke has given me a lot to think about in terms of what it means to have a voice among the chaos and not making it all about preaching to the choir.

4. Whistle-blowers

I love today’s cartoon from Naked Pastor.  This is the flip side of the soapboxing Luke Harms encourages us to avoid in the above post.  There are times when it is absolutely necessary to make sure people know the damage being done.  Spiritual abuse is real and it’s happening in too many of our churches.  Let’s make sure it doesn’t keep happening.

5. Speaking of cartoons…

I was thrilled to see that ASBO Jesus (a.k.a. Jon Birch) is back!  My reaction to this cartoon: “Oh, I don’t know anyone like that, right?”  At least, I wish I didn’t.  Too bad we can’t really implement this therapy.

6. Another fantastic post from Rachel Held Evans

Every time I think she can’t possibly write a post I like better than a previous one, she does.  When I read this, I couldn’t help thinking, “How does she know exactly what I’ve felt?”  This excellent piece on questions of the heart summed up the problem I’ve had for a long time with both Calvinism and Arminianism in regard to the Divine Elect.  (Yes, I know I just resorted to Christianese.)  I hope that others who read her words will be moved to think about how they communicate the love of God.

7. Best response to condescension

I am a mom.  I love being a mom.  But motherhood is not somehow the pinnacle of womanhood.  Read both this post and the one to which it links (for context).  When it comes to my friendships with women who are not moms, how about if I don’t judge you and we spend our time together sharing the different adventures we have had and looking forward to sharing a few of our own together.  Sound good?

8. Respecting our husbands

I have to admit, the title of this one grabbed me: Faking It: Why You Should Stop Treating Your Husband Like a Toddler, and ACTUALLY Respect Him.  I have had bad experiences with being told to “respect” my husband (like the whole “don’t wear your bedroom slippers when you greet him at the door” thing).  This blog post is not one of them, though.  I didn’t literally leap out of my seat and cheer, but that was definitely how I was feeling after reading Jenny Rae Armstrong’s post.  Yes, yes, oh yes–this is what a healthy marriage looks like.

9. Something worth celebrating

Last Saturday, I had the privilege to watch the live video feed of my online friend Shay’s ordination.  Congratulations and much love, Shay.  I am privileged to know you.  Folks can read a bit about it here and see some pics.  One small step…

10. Music I love

I will leave you with this YouTube video of one of the pieces my orchestra is playing at our concert on March 9.  If you are in the area, come out to Roberts Wesleyan College (7:30 start, with a pre-concert lecture at 7) to see us.  Tickets are $10 and you can get them through the box office (there is no extra fee for ordering by phone if you pick them up at the Will Call booth the night of the concert).

[youtube=http://youtu.be/5R3OcYXy0XU]

That’s it, everybody.  Have a great weekend!

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