review

Title: Raven’s Girl

Author: Anastasia Vitsky

Print Length: 123 pages

Publication Date: July 29, 2016

Category: Lesbian romance

A sugar mama can buy anything, even love. Right?

When stay-at-home author Alena struggles to make ends meet, she receives an odd but intriguing proposition.

Raven lost her entire family in a car accident years ago, and her inherited wealth can’t assuage her loneliness. She wants a girl to discipline, and she will pay a generous stipend to do so.

The catch?

Alena must spend 24 hours each week at Raven’s house and do whatever she says.

No safeword.

No negotiations.

Can Alena give up her freedom in exchange for financial security and the possibility of more?

Or will her stubbornness drive Raven away?

What a delightfully sweet summer read. Short enough to be read in an afternoon on the deck, long enough to be a fully satisfying and complete story.

For the most part, this is purely fun with little of the complexity of many of the author’s other works. While part of me misses the spark and the depth I’ve grown to love, I still felt like this one was worth showing up for. It makes for a nice break from heavier topics.

Raven is set in the same world as Gemstone. It’s not necessary to read that one first, though I did think it helped some with the context. It was also a treat for fans to get another bit of Mistress Lorelei. This time, Alena, one of Lorelei’s online acquaintances, gets a story.

There’s a bit of tension between Raven and Alena at their first meeting, due to miscommunications. However, they’re able to move past them with little angst. This is largely about the two of them deepening their connection with one another. They strike me as a bit of an odd couple, but it works for them, and they do have good chemistry.

This is one of the few times I would have liked to see more. I think this could easily have been a longer work, with more detail about Alena. We certainly know her as a person, but we know very little about her life outside of the current moment and relationship. The only history we see is her fascination with spanking/discipline. We see a bit more about Raven’s history, but we get less of her life outside of her desire to have a girl of her own. In both situations, I’d like to have known more about what we were missing.

That aside, they are both well-developed, personality-wise. I particularly enjoyed Alena’s forays into e-auctions. Alena is highly relatable, especially her experiences as a career author. I didn’t connect as well with Raven, perhaps because I’ve never lived in her world as a wealthy benefactor. Still, I thought she was also fascinating, especially her insecurities when it came to Alena.

Overall, this is an enjoyable story, if a bit on the fluffy side. For new readers, welcome to the club—this is just the tip of the iceberg. For seasoned fans, a nice interlude between the more intense reads.

For sweet naughtiness, delightful characters, and a relaxing summer read, this gets 8/10 fountain pens.

Heat Rating: 2 ink wells (mild/implied sensuality)

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01JDJVSYU/

Title: We Awaken

Author: Calista Lynne

Print Length: 180 pages

Publication Date: July 14, 2016

Publisher: Harmony Ink Press

Category: YA, F/F, asexual

Victoria Dinham doesn’t have much left to look forward to. Since her father died in a car accident, she lives only to fulfill her dream of being accepted into the Manhattan Dance Conservatory. But soon she finds another reason to look forward to dreams when she encounters an otherworldly girl named Ashlinn, who bears a message from Victoria’s comatose brother. Ashlinn is tasked with conjuring pleasant dreams for humans, and through the course of their nightly meetings in Victoria’s mind, the two become close. Ashlinn also helps Victoria understand asexuality and realize that she, too, is asexual.

But then Victoria needs Ashlinn’s aid outside the realm of dreams, and Ashlinn assumes human form to help Victoria make it to her dance audition. They take the opportunity to explore New York City, their feelings for each other, and the nature of their shared asexuality. But like any dream, it’s too good to last. Ashlinn must shrug off her human guise and resume her duties creating pleasant nighttime visions—or all of humanity will pay the price.

I really enjoyed this book. It’s hard to find good literature with characters expressly identifying as asexual, so that aspect in particular had my interest. I thought the matter of both young women’s sense of self was done well, especially because they had somewhat different feelings surrounding their sexuality.

The story itself is intriguing, even if I wish there had been a bit more world-building. It mostly takes place in the waking human world, but there is a good bit about the dream world as well. I would have loved to know more about the place Ashlinn came from and how she became the bringer of good dreams (and how Semira became the bringer of bad dreams). I can’t say much more without spoilers, but it seems like there’s more to it than what we read on the page.

In the dream world, I was a bit confused as to what exactly the point was for some things. I definitely understood—and appreciated—the need for balance between good and bad dreams. What made me a little uncomfortable was how good dreams seemed to be equated with youth and beauty while bad dreams were equated with age and ugliness. That seemed unnecessary for the plot and not necessarily well thought out.

There were three things which stood out to me that I loved. One, it’s incredibly well-written in terms of the poetic language. It all has a quiet, dreamy quality to it, even the parts in Victoria’s waking life. The prose is lovely and evocative. I thought the flow of the words matched the tone and plot of the book perfectly.

The second thing I loved were the characters. Victoria was easy for me to connect to in her insecurities and worries. She’s an excellent narrator, believable in her imperfections. Ashlinn is a wonderful balance to Victoria with her gentle confidence. And Ellie is the perfect sidekick, free-spirited and fun but the sort of person who has Victoria’s back whether Victoria realizes it or not (she eventually does).

Finally, I thought the emotional aspects were beautifully written. There are some tough subjects handled in here, from family death to fears to suicidal thoughts. Some of the content might even be triggering or upsetting to sensitive readers. However, I never felt that anything was glossed over or avoided or treated glibly. The author uses a light touch to bring readers through the difficult content.

What I think is appealing about this story is the way the real world and the fantasy dream world are a smooth blend of truth and wish fulfillment. There is a part in all of us which longs for the world to be made right when it’s a confusing, painful mess. Ashlinn reaches through the pages to give all of us a good dream where hope always wins out in the end. It may not be reality, but it is why many of us read: to find in the pages of a book what we can’t hope to find in our waking lives.

For beautifully written prose, an excellent primer on asexuality, and an afternoon’s escape into the land of dreams, this gets 8/10 fountain pens.

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/We-Awaken-Calista-Lynne/dp/1634769953/

Calista Lynne is a perpetual runaway and glitter addict who grew up on the American East Coast and is currently studying in London. She is having difficulty adjusting to the lack of Oxford commas across the pond and writes because it always seemed to make more sense than mathematics.

Look for her near the caffeinated beverages.

Today I’m chatting with Calista Lynne about writing, life, and her current project. Welcome! Let’s talk a little about We Awaken.

What inspired you to write this story?

I wanted to write the representation I wish I had seen growing up. My novel is about two asexual females in a same sex relationship and they do get a happy ending. The ultimate goal was to speak frankly about asexuality and bring a greater understanding of it to a larger audience.

My other inspirations were fairytales and dreams. This is Young Adult Magical Realism, after all.

Is there a character you feel especially connected to? Why?

There are aspects of myself throughout the book but one character who I sort of look like is Ellie. She has white, spiky hair and wears pleather. I didn’t look like her while I was writing the book but a few months after I just gradually ended up cutting my hair even shorter and buying a whole lot of bleach. It wasn’t intentional but I looked in the mirror one day and realized something seemed familiar.

What was the hardest part of writing this?

The beginning. I spent ages stewing over how to start it without weighing down the audience with a lot of backstory. Eventually I got there, but I read a ton of examples of first lines before coming up with my own.

Choose a favorite line or short passage. What do you like about it?

I’m not sure if it’s my favorite but one passage that sticks out in my memory is when the main character, Victoria, is trying to distract her friend who is getting a tattoo with a story from when they were growing up. She says “You told me how you hate daffodils because they’re morbid. They stick around for a month making everything lemon drop yellow, then die and get replaced by worse flowers. How the hell does an elementary schooler grasp the concept of beauty not being permanent?”

Flowers are a running theme throughout the story, if the cover doesn’t make that obvious enough.

Tell us a little about any upcoming projects.

Soon I’m going to begin work on a middle grade novel involving fairies and time distortion. It is going to take quite a bit of research but I’m very excited! The story is fun enough that I’ll definitely have a good time writing it, no matter how long that takes.

How has your life changed since becoming a published author?

Strangely enough, it’s has less writing in it. Now I spend a lot of time promoting this novel and speaking with people who enjoyed the book and whatnot. I promise I’ll get back to being a novelist soon, though! I have a fantastic idea I’m dying to get down.

If you could take a time machine back 10 years, what would you tell your past self?

Enjoy your emo phase while it lasts but please don’t dye your hair orange and brown. I’m sure someone out there can pull it off but I am not them.

What do you hope people say about you after you’re gone?

I hope they say I was kind and gave good hugs. It’d be cool if people would reminisce over my glitter and pink Doc Martens because those two fashion statements are as much a part of my personality as anything else.

Word Sprints!

1. Reusable or disposable grocery bags? Reusable. I live in London and they charge for bags.
2. Musical theater or rock concert? Musical theatre.
3. What’s your favorite book? American Gods by Neil Gaiman
4. What’s your favorite ice cream? Coffee
5. What’s your favorite movie? The Princess and the Frog

Title: Order in the Court (Survivors Club #2)

Author: Casey Lawrence

Publisher: Harmony Ink Press (a division of Dreamspinner Press)

Publication date: August 4, 2016

Length: 164 pages

Corey Nguyen watched her three best friends fall victim to a killer, but it’s becoming clear her ordeal won’t end there. While trying to be a college student, have some kind of social life, and just be normal again, she learns the murderer is demanding a trial. He claims he’s innocent and was forced into confessing—which means Corey will have to testify to what she saw.

The idea of facing the killer in court worsens Corey’s anxiety and forces her to relive the horrifying events of that night. And just when she thinks things can’t get worse, she realizes her mother and the prosecuting attorney are probably more than friends. All Corey wants is to put the tragedy behind her, but it’s clear the end is not yet in sight.

Like its predecessor (Out of Order), the second book in the Survivors Club series relies on an unusual narrative timeline to tell the continuing story of Corey Ngyuen in the aftermath of the brutal murders of her best friends. As excited as I was to read more about Corey and the people around her, I was admittedly doubtful that a second book could keep pace with the first. Any misgivings I had were quickly laid to rest. The sequel is every bit as good as the original, and the variable timeline works equally well with the new story.

As before, Corey alternates between current events and past actions which led to the present day. The format works well because each snapshot is situated to give us pieces of the puzzle. There isn’t a murder mystery this time around, but there are some surprises for both Corey and readers. Reality is juxtaposed with Corey’s perceptions, keeping readers on their toes throughout.

In this installment, Corey is preparing for and testifying at the trial of her friends’ killer as the only witness. Meanwhile, she’s trying to navigate life as a college freshman and stay under the radar to keep from being found out as “murder girl.” She’s also maintaining friendships with the two boys who had emotional connections to her friends—hence “survivors club.”

Corey is an excellent narrator. She is imperfect, but it’s in her flaws that we are able to both relate to her and see how strong she is. One of my favorite parts of the book is when she attempts a new relationship and it sours on the first date. Corey calls her date on some bisexual-antagonistic behavior, but she does it in such a way that it’s almost impossible to find her any more likable than the other young woman. What I appreciate here is the balance; Corey has the right to defend herself, but she shows little compassion. Yet afterward, she realizes her method of handling the situation is a red flag. Her flaw becomes a turning point toward healing from trauma.

Similar to the first book, there is an underlying relationship arc which is hinted at from the beginning and explored through flashbacks. Its full potential isn’t actualized until the end, and while it isn’t necessarily surprising, it doesn’t feel like a cliché, either. In fact, there’s one particular scene which I may be the only person to pick up on and which I think merits further exploration. It’s such a small detail, but it’s an especially intimate moment. I would love to know if it means more than what it appears to be on the surface.

This time around, I was much more drawn in by the supporting cast. I suspect it’s because we are now seeing Corey move from being mired in the past toward creating a future. Her two new close friends are terrific, and both of them surprised me in multiple ways. At the same time, her relationships with her friends’ boyfriends provides an interesting dynamic.

Once again, this is a well-written piece of LGBTQ+ (emphasis on the B) literature. The themes are mature enough this is best suited for older youth, yet it remains age-appropriate in terms of content. It’s an excellent companion to the first novel. I have no idea if Ms. Lawrence plans to write more in the series, but if she does, guaranteed I’ll be reading and sharing.

For plot twists aplenty, superb writing, and an engaging hero, this gets 10/10 fountain pens.

Publisher: https://www.harmonyinkpress.com/books/order-in-the-court-by-casey-lawrence-397-b

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Order-Court-Survivors-Club-Book-ebook/dp/B01IYH8VYW/

Casey Lawrence is an undergraduate English Language and Literature student at Brock University minoring in French and German. The vice-president of the Gay-Straight Alliance and editor of the yearbook in high school, she now volunteers with the Brock English Students’ Association, Brock Faith & Life, Brock Pride, and, most notably, the Brock Leaders Citizenship Society. She lives at home with her mother, grandmother, and her adorable seven-pound Yorkie, Bindi, in Ontario, Canada, where her bedroom is packed wall-to-wall with books. She reads everything from classics to comic books, and is an insatiable consumer of all kinds of stories. From a small city in southern Ontario, she makes frequent trips to Toronto to go to ComicCon, the Pride parade, and to see her friends spin HHC. Casey enjoys dropping some sick rhymes at Poetry Slam, picking through used book stores, marathoning her favourite shows on Netflix, and speaking out against discrimination at her school and in the broader community.

 

Title: Screaming Down Splitsville

Author: Kayla Bashe

Length: 36 pages

Publisher: Torquere Press, LLC (February 23, 2016)

Publication Date: February 23, 2016

Categories: FF, lesbian, YA/NA, Urban Fantasy

 

Screaming Down Splitsville takes place in an alternate 1950s where two groups of people with magical powers fight for dominance. Flip, a young lesbian, thinks her healing powers are completely useless. After her escape from a lab, she’s been grounded to a safe base, and while everyone else is on important missions, she keeps the fridge stocked and fixes the plumbing. However, when a chance coincidence sends her on a solo rescue mission, Flip has a surprising reunion with a woman from her past.

Unable to speak after a botched cleft palate surgery, Emma-Rose grew up half-wild in the Southern backwoods- until strangers discovered her magical powers and imprisoned her in a laboratory of torture. Her one salvation was the woman in the next cell, Flip. Now Flip’s returned, and according to her, they’ll both make it to safety. But Emma’s plans have failed so many times that she has no hope left to lose.

As the two women seek to evade their pursuers, their friendship rekindles, and they are forced to confront both enemies and insecurities.

This is a fast, fun read with a big heart. I love the characters and the setting, and the story held my interest all the way through. When I say it’s a quick read, it really is—this can be read in a single sitting.

It did take me a bit to understand the world of the story. I’m not sure I’d have characterized it as an alternate 1950s if that hadn’t been in the blurb, though I can certainly see it. I’m not sure that even matters; it’s not a particularly important part of the story. Far more interesting is how the scientists brutally experiment on their subjects. I would love to see more about how the groups of people came to be at odds with each other and what will happen as a result.

I don’t quite get the title or what it’s a reference to. Maybe the war between the different groups of people? Once again, it isn’t really relevant to whether or not it’s a good story, but I’m still curious what it means.

As for the rest, it’s delightful. There’s plenty of excitement as the girls flee Emma-Rose’s captors, some neat bits of magic, and a wonderfully accepting sanctuary waiting for them at the end of their journey. Sweet enough to be read by young adults but captivating enough to appeal to a wider range of people, this one’s definitely a recommended read. What’s not to like about strong young women getting the best of evil men in lab coats?

For an exciting road trip, excellent writing, and two strong main characters, this gets 8/10 fountain pens.

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Screaming-Down-Splitsville-Kayla-Bashe-ebook/dp/B01C5J79G6/

 

Title: Two Natures

Author: Jendi Reiter

Publication Date: Septermber 2016

Publisher: Saddle Road Press

Categories: Historical, gay fiction

Two Natures is the coming-of-age story of Julian Selkirk, a fashion photographer in New York City in the early 1990s. His faith in Jesus helped him survive his childhood in the Atlanta suburbs with an abusive alcoholic father, but the church’s condemnation of his sexual orientation has left him alienated and ashamed. Yearning for new ideals to anchor him after his loss of faith, Julian seeks his identity through love affairs with three very different men: tough but childish Phil Shanahan, a personal trainer who takes a dangerous shortcut to success; enigmatic, cosmopolitan Richard Molineux, the fashion magazine editor who gives him his first big break; and Peter Edelman, an earnest left-wing activist with a secret life. Amid the devastation of the AIDS epidemic and the racial tensions of New York politics, Julian learns to see beyond surface attractions and short-term desires, and to use his art to serve his community.

I have to admit, this is a really tough read. Not because it isn’t well-written—it is indeed stellar in that regard—but because it is so stark and unflinching. Content warning not because it’s explicit (many of us have read books with far more graphic content) but because of the heaviness of the subject matter. Anyone old enough to have lived through the early 1990s, and lost loved ones during that time, needs to be aware that the middle of the story is about the death of one character from AIDS-related illness. You have been warned.

This is a difficult book for me to review. On the one hand, despite its length, it’s surprisingly fast-paced. There isn’t a lot of wasted space; everything has a purpose, so it doesn’t feel as though it’s lagging anywhere in terms of moving forward. The writing style is superior, in the style of the best literary fiction. At the same time, my reaction to it is very much along those lines—I’m not here to be entertained by this book. It’s not a feel-good love story or a tale of tragedy-to-triumph. It’s meant to be appreciated mainly for its historical value and technically skilled craftsmanship. For a number of reasons (the heavy topics, the highly literary style, the depth of the psychology), this is one to read with a group for the purpose of discussion.

There’s a lot covered in this novel, and the title says it best. Everything in Julian’s life is split, and he spends most of the story trying to make whole the things he sees as fractured. Despite the fact that there’s a sub-thread about the religion of his youth, it actually doesn’t factor in much beyond his musings until near the end. However, his broken trust in his faith and family of origin drive nearly every other relationship he has. It’s vital for people of faith to read this with the understanding of how religious institutions create and contribute to the oppression specifically of the LGBT community.

On a personal level, I found this hard to read. For one thing, those were my coming of age years as well. It’s Peter, rather than narrator Julian, to whom I relate most—his idealism is different from mine, but I understand him. Several times while reading I had to put the book down because although I had a much more sheltered existence at that time, I certainly do remember those years. Reading this certainly puts into perspective why achieving marriage equality is not merely a sign of assimilation and imitation of heteronormativity, and also why it’s too little, too late.

Beyond that, I did find this sometimes frustrating to read. Julian is spectacularly unlikable until closer to the end, and his friends aren’t a whole lot better. They read to me as self-absorbed, and the only time they appear to break out of that is when caring for their dying friend (which, by the way, is just about the most excellently written part of the entire thing, despite it being so profoundly heartbreaking). Outside of that, they treat each other terribly. In particular, I couldn’t stand the way Julian talks about and to Ari. None of them seem compelled to take a whole lot of responsibility for their behavior, and I don’t mean with regard to sex. I wanted to see Julian grow and mature a bit more, I think. In some ways, we do get that, and there are flashes of it when he finally stands up to a person who has been using and lying to him. I suppose I just needed more.

Ultimately, I could probably talk for days about this book because it’s impossible to capture everything about such a dense read in a short review. My own personal grievances with the characters aside, I do think this is a phenomenal work, and I highly recommend it. It should be required reading if for no other reason than that we’ve already forgotten what life was like in those days.

For top-notch writing, gritty realism, and historical value, this gets 10/10 fountain pens.

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Two-Natures-Jendi-Reiter-ebook/dp/B01H7SKWW8

(Fall 1993)

The chandelier above the stage of the Amato Opera House ascended on a cable over our heads. The little theater on the Bowery looked like someplace the stagecoaches would stop in a spaghetti Western, and indoors, their special effects were just as creaky. Sitting in the tattered red velvet seat next to mine, Richard Molineux hummed a melody I didn’t recognize. No one who watches TV can avoid learning a few arias, at the risk of forming indelible associations between “La donna è mobile” and spaghetti sauce, or the “Ride of the Valkyries” and Bugs Bunny. Richard’s tune was in a minor key, a meandering sequence that never resolved on the expected notes. He noticed me listening and his steel-gray eyes brightened.

“Do you know it?” he asked, in an amused voice. I shook my head. His thin lips upturned slightly.

“That is Britten.”

Though Richard’s English could betray him at times with an odd turn of phrase, I concluded that he was talking about a composer I’d never heard of, rather than a country I had, and I nodded as if he’d told me something useful. His arm, in his crisp gray suit jacket, pressed against mine on the narrow armrest. Some would call opera a queen’s cliché, but if this were true of Richard, it was only in the way that two dozen long-stemmed roses and a diamond ring are cliché. In other words, sign me up.

The house went dark. On my other side, Cheryl Kingston continued retouching her face powder with a compact mirror that included a tiny flashlight bulb, one of the promotional items from her Revlon gift bag. I do believe in being versatile, but this object struck me as particularly silly, unless one needed to do a line of coke during a power outage.

White spotlights bathed the stage. A full-throated soprano voice was amplified through the theater, keening an Italian aria over a pounding techno soundtrack. Richard’s nose flared as if he had smelled something unpleasant. He muttered a comment to Marcia, his wife, who sat between him and my boss, the photographer Dane Langley, with her pencil poised over her notebook. I heard little of her response, in her tobacco-husky Long Island voice, except the words “with the times,” but it made him chuckle.

Marcia Molineux — fortyish, flat-chested, tall as a man, with close-cropped chestnut hair and a fondness for olive green pants suits — was the publisher of Femme NY, the dollars-and-francs foundation of Richard’s castle in the clouds. People with a romantic imagination claimed that he had named the magazine for her. It couldn’t be an accident, though, that his long slim fingers kept brushing the back of my hand. My mind spun through a series of calculations with too many variables: self-interest times pleasure divided by risk.

Cheryl offered me a piece of her chewing gum, which I accepted only to be polite. It was thanks to her, after all, that Dane had brought me along. Since my promotion to second assistant — my predecessor, Vince, having launched an illustrious career photographing silicone-injected blondes for For Him Magazine — Dane had gone from slighting me because I was unimportant to slighting me as a potential competitor. We worked well enough together, but for invitations to New York Fashion Week and other places where my presence wasn’t strictly necessary, I had to lean pretty heavily on the fact that I’d kept Cheryl from falling into the Central Park duck pond during a feature shoot for Mademoiselle.

I chewed for a few seconds before the unpleasant taste alerted me that it was Nicorette — a complete waste, smoking being one vice that had never tempted me. I thought of asking Cheryl if she had any gum that tasted like married men, but decided that this was inappropriate to say at the opera, even if there wasn’t any opera going on.

What there was, on stage, was a parade of runway models showcasing the designs of Anton Fische, whose suddenly-trendy logo (a jagged F resembling a lightning bolt) was displayed in black against the silver backdrop. The theme of the show, according to our programs, was “Les Pêcheurs de Perles”. That might explain why one of the girls wore a wetsuit with a ballerina skirt, while another sported a fin-like hairdo spiked with gel above a turtleneck dress made of chain mail. Over the synthesized backbeat, the diva sang a sequence of inhumanly high notes, sharp as icicles dropping off a roof.

“Controlled excess,” Richard said, apropos of nothing, or everything.

“That makes no sense, honey,” Marcia said, scribbling in her notebook.

“Exactly,” Richard replied, and they both laughed lightly. Dane laughed too, though they hadn’t been talking to him. The Femme NY editors threw a fair amount of work our way, but I got the sense that they didn’t personally care for my boss. The womanizing, the drug rumors, the chest hair — it was all very 1980s, too many shots of beauty queens on beaches. It’s hard to be ironic in Florida. He knew that I knew the score, so we both edged our way in on either side of the Molineux’ conversation, while Cheryl, miffed at not sitting next to Dane, chewed her gum loudly, and hardly anyone remembered to look at the clothes.

A woman with silver bands across her chest walked downstage, her collar frill rising above her head like a clamshell. I thought Fische had outsmarted himself with the setting. Next to the theater’s gilded plaster curlicues and red velvet, the models looked like Martians who had crash-landed in a Wild West bordello. I ventured to say as much to Richard, who replied, “It is to be memorable, that is the new beauty.”

“So’s a bus accident,” Marcia quipped. One might think she was putting him down, except for the fact that Dane’s latest feature for them had had an earthquake theme. Models clinging to collapsed windowsills with their lacquered fingernails, swinging their high-heeled boots over a chasm of rubble. We had staged it on the site of an elementary school in the Bronx that was being demolished. Smells of chalk and bubble gum, and probably asbestos, were set free by the wrecking ball, undetectable in the picture. I found an unbroken red crayon in a pile of sand and Dane turned it into a moment of pathos, the girl holding it up to her smudged face like a child playing with her mother’s lipstick. That was our favorite shot, but Richard took it out.

“But yes, the shock of what you do not understand, the wrong thing in the wrong place, that is what takes you — beyond,” Richard went on.

“Like the music?” I asked.

“No, the music is merely terrible.”

The show came to a close, much to the relief of Richard’s eardrums, and the models all returned to the stage with Fische to share in the applause.

“You know I used to model swimsuits for him in Miami when he was still Tony Fusco,” Cheryl said to the group at large.

“So you’ve said,” Marcia responded, at the same time as I said “No.” Lately I wasn’t sure how much to believe Cheryl’s stories. The one about the Italian underwear model in the hot-air balloon was somewhat plausible, but that business with the polo team sounded anatomically impossible. A cry for help, my sister would have called it, but she was a sophomore psychology student at NYU and thought it was a cry for help when I ate a foot-long hot dog at Gray’s Papaya.

Jendi Reiter is the author of the novel Two Natures (Saddle Road Press, forthcoming 2016) and four poetry books and chapbooks, most recently Bullies in Love (Little Red Tree Publishing, 2015). Awards include the 2011 James Knudsen Editor’s Prize in Fiction from Bayou Magazine, the 2011 OSA Enizagam Award for Fiction, second prize in the 2010 Iowa Review Awards for Fiction, and first prize in the 2008 Chapter One Promotions International Short Story Competition. Her stories have appeared in The Iowa Review, American Fiction, The Adirondack Review, Words + Images, and The Wordstock Ten Anthology, among others. She is the editor of WinningWriters.com, an online resource site for creative writers.

Blog: www.jendireiter.com

Twitter: @JendiReiter

What inspired you to write this story?

There are many ways to answer that question—personal, political, literary—but your word “inspired” reminds me that it all started with the Holy Spirit. In 2006 I attended the Calvin College Festival of Faith and Writing with a friend who was then my evangelical Bible study teacher and writing mentor. The keynote speaker on the last evening was Lutheran pastor and novelist Walter Wangerin Jr., whose books had taught me about God’s unconditional love when I was growing up.

Wangerin was battling cancer, so his address was charged with a special urgency to pass on the sacred gifts he’d been given. He spoke about the power of stories to bring order out of the chaos of our feelings, like God creating light from the formless void in Genesis. He said that a tale told truly from the heart could revive a despairing soul, like the ravens that fed Elijah in the wilderness.

This way of envisioning my vocation finally allowed me to break through my fear of not knowing how to write the “perfect” novel. God could still use my sincere, humble efforts. Though Two Natures bears little resemblance to that first page I wrote at 1:30 AM in a Grand Rapids motel room, my prophetic encounter at the Calvin College conference gave me the faith and openness to write with honesty and empathy about lives different from my own.

Is there a character you feel especially connected to?

After a decade of working together, Julian, my narrator, has become my alter ego and imaginary best friend. We have similar interests (Jesus, sex, and clothes) but are different enough that I gain wisdom from checking in with his perspective. Where I might over-intellectualize, he leads with his heart. Where I might be cautious or cynical about people, he is grateful when they exceed his low expectations.

What was the hardest part of writing this?

Losing the religious friends and community who couldn’t accept that a book about gay sex could honor God. Facing my fears that they are right about God’s judgment on my choices, which brought me new understanding of my family trauma history and how it’s impaired my ability to trust that divine attachment figure in the sky. Daring to believe that personal experience and my creative process have as much authority as the Bible to show me where the Holy Spirit is leading me.

Choose a favorite line or short passage. What do you like about it?

What had happened to us, to me, that there was nothing inside? We could even now be appearing in someone else’s tourist photos, two golden boys holding hands on the terrace, the perfect face of the White Party. I recalled the abstinence lectures that were forced on us in Sunday school: the two cardboard hearts pasted together and peeled apart and pasted together again, over and over, until they were tattered and smudged, as unattractive as we couldn’t bear to be. But wasn’t the heart made of muscle, didn’t muscles get stronger with use?

In this chapter, Julian and his first boyfriend are at a circuit party, and Julian is worried that they’re falling out of love. I like this because it reveals Julian’s core preoccupations as an artist and a lover: the tangled relationship between appearance and reality, the use of humor to deflect pain, and the conflict between Christian purity culture and his natural inclination to open his heart (and his zipper) again and again.

Tell us a little about any upcoming projects.

I’m working on the sequel, Origin Story. The main character is Peter, the man whom Julian loves and tries to win in Two Natures. (No spoilers—read it and see if he succeeds!) While working as a mentor in a transitional home for at-risk youth, Peter collaborates with a teenage bi-gendered artist on a gay superhero comic, whose themes start to parallel traumatic memories he’s unearthing. Peter’s controversial discoveries challenge Julian to confront beliefs he’s internalized from his Southern Baptist upbringing, such as the “ex-gay therapy” myth that homosexuality is a curable disorder caused by abuse. There will also be a lot of bondage scenes and pie.

What subjects would you never write about?

I would not write extended scenes of graphic violence—I don’t need those images in my head. I occasionally enjoy reading “hard SF” (science fiction that goes into great detail about physics or technology) if there are also fully developed characters in it, but I don’t have the technical background to write it. The only thing I remember about college physics class is the day our professor accidentally crashed through the classroom door on a golf cart during a demonstration on momentum.

Are there topics or issues you wish were more common in books?

In M/M and gay literary fiction, I would like to see protagonists with more diversity in terms of age, ethnicity, gender presentation, and body type. They don’t all have to be macho 20-somethings with WASP-y names and six-pack abs. Yes, it’s “fantasy”, but not everyone has the same fantasies! I’m interested in stories about being GLBT in a non-Christian religious context. In all fiction, we need more characters with disabilities and neurodiversity who have normal careers and sexual lives, as opposed to the usual “inspiration” or “too miserable to live” stories. (In other words, I want Heidi Cullinan to write 10 sequels to Carry the Ocean!) Lastly, I’m fed up with books that feature a trauma or child abuse storyline without a realistic portrayal of PTSD—both the complexity and long time horizon of recovery, and the fact that healing doesn’t have to culminate in reconciliation or forgiveness.

What is one subject you would really like to tackle in a story?

I spent seven difficult years trying to conceive and then adopt a child, and as John Goodman’s homicidal salesman says in Barton Fink, “I could tell you some stories.” But I need some more distance from those events before I can write fiction about them in a way that follows the characters’ needs, rather than my own need for catharsis. Perhaps Julian and his true love will try to become dads in one of the Two Natures sequels…

Word Sprints!

1. What’s a charity/cause you support: Soulforce (http://www.soulforce.org/#!what-we-do/clm2) combats spiritual violence against LGBTQ people and other minorities through loving nonviolent resistance, and promotes theology that affirms the dignity of all people.
2. What genre (other than your own) do you like to read: Poetry, queer theology, mystery novels, science fiction anthologies, comics/graphic novels, psychology and trauma studies.
3. Do you have any body art: When I finished Two Natures, in October 2015, I treated myself to a lion tattoo on my left leg. It represents God’s love (Aslan from Narnia series) and my inner masculine power.
4. In school, were you more academic, artsy, or athletic: In high school I was so academic that I wrote an 80-page paper on T.S. Eliot’s Four Quartets for my own entertainment, over the summer.
5. What’s your wake-up routine: Turn off alarm, snuggle husband, oversleep 15 minutes, check my daily Tarot card iPhone app (http://www.gaiantarot.com/shop/gaian-tarot-app/), get dressed and go “on duty” with my 4-year-old son.

 

Title: Checking In

Author: Debbie McGowan

Series: Checking Him Out (#3)

In the Checking Him Out Series:
Checking Him Out (Book One)
Checking Him Out For the Holidays (novella)
Hiding Out (novella – A crossover featuring Matty and Noah, and Josh, George and Libby from Hiding Behind The Couch)
Taking Him On (Book Two – A Noah and Matty novel)
Checking In (Book Three)

Length: 250 pages

Publisher: Beaten Track Publishing

Publication Date: December 15, 2015

 

Freelance engineer Sol Brooks is in hot demand. He’s landed a couple of big contracts and is all set for a business trip back to the other side of the pond. The last thing he needs is an unexpected visitor to complicate his departure.

Especially when that visitor puts his relationship with husband Adam on rocky ground.

Determined to fulfil his contractual obligations, Sol goes ahead with the trip. It’s a great opportunity and a chance to catch up with old friends. And he’s going to check in regularly.

What could possibly go wrong?

* * * * *

NOTE: this novel follows on from previous stories, and coincides with Taking Him On, but can also be read as a stand-alone.

* * * * *

WARNING: this story contains sex acts between consenting male adults.

Note: Though this is part of a series, they can all easily be read as stand-alones. I read them out of order except for this one, and it did not spoil my enjoyment.

I can’t believe it took me over seven months to get around to reading this. It’s probably my favorite in the series. Sol is such a great narrator, and I love his sense of humor which I will call “politely snarky.” He always seems just this side of exasperated by the chaos around him and oblivious to how much of it he’s helped create. Fortunately for us, that makes a good story. And he really does learn how his actions and reactions have ripple effects, so he gets a gold star.

This is pretty much what I look for in a story. The writing is excellent, the pacing is good, and while there is a romantic relationship, the focus is not exclusively on the two of them. There’s also a good balance between the heavy, difficult things and the more lighthearted ones, keeping it from becoming either too weighted down by or too cheerfully dismissive of real-world challenges.

There’s some romance of the loving married couple variety, which includes some delightfully steamy parts, if that’s what you’re into. On at least one occasion, that means you might want to tell Sol to stop thinking and get on with it already, very much like real life. I’m generally non-committal on sex in a book; I don’t care if it’s there or not. In this case, I thought it worked well, matching the mood of the moment nicely. There is quite a bit of explicit fooling around, so you’ve been warned.

As in life, this isn’t a tidy summary of two lost souls finding each other and living happily ever after. Adam and Sol have a complicated existence, often messy and unpredictable. What makes them good is the way they fit together, both as a couple and with the people around them. They start off this story with a lot to learn about how to communicate effectively, and the way they both grow is wonderfully satisfying.

One of the themes here, and which I see a lot in many of the author’s works, is making a home with those who know and love us best. They may be family of origin or by choice, but whoever they are, these are the people we come back to no matter how far we’ve wandered. I can’t say for sure this is intentional, but I suspect it is because virtually nothing in these stories is accidental. In this case, Sol and Adam don’t start out seeing themselves as the center, but they are, and by the end, they’re in process of figuring out how that works.

The whole story is a bit of an emotional ride. Sometimes I was crying with laughter, and other times just plain crying—often on the same page. The plot itself matters very little here (though it’s quite good) because it’s all about what’s going on in the heads and hearts of Sol and Adam and the people they love. So many of the things they express are painfully (or awkwardly or frustratingly) familiar. Many of us can recognize our own failures in Sol’s flawed narrative. Hopefully we can also see our redemption in the actions he takes to make it right in the end. Guaranteed we see our potential to love and be loved through it all.

For a deeply emotional journey home, a narrator who’s imperfect but likable, and a stellar supporting cast of characters, this gets 10/10 fountain pens.

Heat Rating: 4/5 (frequent and/or explicit sexual content)

Beaten Track: http://www.beatentrackpublishing.com/shop/proddetail.php?prod=checkingin_format

Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Checking-Him-Out-Book-ebook/dp/B017166SL0

iTunes: https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/checking-in/id1052059068?mt=11

DEBBIE McGOWAN is an author and publisher based in a semi-rural corner of Lancashire, England. She writes character-driven, realist fiction, celebrating life, love and relationships. A working class girl, she ‘ran away’ to London at seventeen, was homeless, unemployed and then homeless again, interspersed with animal rights activism (all legal, honest ;)) and volunteer work as a mental health advocate. At twenty-five, she went back to college to study social science— tough with two toddlers, but they had a ‘stay at home’ dad, so it worked itself out. These days, the toddlers are young women (much to their chagrin), and Debbie teaches undergraduate students, writes novels and runs an independent publishing company, occasionally grabbing an hour of sleep where she can.