Happy Wednesday! Sorry I’m running late today. It’s been beyond hot here, and we don’t have air conditioning. Still, I managed to write about 2k words and attend a fellow author’s online release day party as well as taking care of some organizing tasks. Not bad.
This novel is currently a Very Sore Spot because Nate informed me I’m telling his story All Wrong. Which means that I need to make two seemingly minor changes which will eventually lead to much bigger changes. The good news is, it makes a lot more sense this way. What I can’t decide is if I need to ditch another plot strand. I’m thinking I do, but I’m not sure what that means for the story as a whole.
Anyway, on to the WIPpet. This follows directly from last week, when Nate walked into his shared apartment to find The Boyfriend arguing with his roommate Jamie. There’s a bit of non-consensual mild (not explicit) touching in this, so if that bothers you, you may want to skip it.
WIPmath: 7/13 = 7 + 13 = 20 sentences.
Nate listened for a few minutes, catching the gist of the argument. The Boyfriend was after Jamie about some plans he’d made which Jamie either didn’t want to go through with or hadn’t agreed to in the first place. Nate guessed it was the latter because Jamie wasn’t one to break a commitment.
“Please,” Jamie begged. “You know how I feel about it.” He sounded like he was on the verge of tears.
The Boyfriend tsk’d. “For once in your life, think about how I feel.”
“I am!” Jamie protested. “You can take someone else. I can’t, okay? Please.” He was shaking.
The Boyfriend obviously realized he wasn’t getting anywhere because his next move was to step closer and put his hands on Jamie’s shoulders. “Sh, baby. Come on. It’s not as big a deal as you’re making it. We don’t even have to stay the whole time. Everyone wants to see you, and I want to show them how hot you still are.” He kissed Jamie’s lips, despite the fact that Jamie was a stone in response.
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Oh, I’ve had relationships with people like The Boyfriend. Will Nate stand up for his friend, or will Jamie give in? I hope not, because the “how hot you still are” comment really got my hackles up! Not cool!
I hope Nate helps you figure out exactly what you need to do to get his story right, and that that makes clear what else, if anything, needs to change.
The Boyfriend is making a reference to Jamie’s former profession, but he’s doing it in a way that’s a dig at Jamie. When it comes to The Boyfriend, Jamie has a tendency to give in until he’s fed up and then break things off–only to eventually go right back. Nate’s going to step in here, but whether or not his actions have a lasting impact remains to be seen.
I was surprised/not surprised at the direction this took. I had originally introduced another character for a particular story arc, but Nate claimed it as his instead. When I thought about it, it made sense. The whole story is about Nate blaming himself but also refusing to let go of things that aren’t good for him, so it was fitting.
*shudder* That switch from angry to (supposedly) soothing says a lot about the type of guy The Boyfriend is. Poor Jamie. 🙁
I hope the changes don’t end up being too headache-inducing.
It’s complicated, but yeah, The Boyfriend is definitely *that* type of person.
The changes so far have actually made things much, much easier to work with. I wasn’t happy about having to make a change, but it will end up being better this way.
Oh, I do not like The Boyfriend at all. He needs his ass kicking.
He needs…help. Not that he should be allowed to take Jamie down with him, of course, but that’s where he needs to go. Probably a good ass-kicking would motivate him.
yeah, still not like the Boyfriend(and I’m guessing that’s what you were going for). Hope you figure out the story Nate wants to tell.
And I’m with you on the heat. We just have a couple window a/c units. usually we don’t put them in until August. We had them in in June this year. it can be really hard9at least for me) to get anything done when it’s really hot.
I was definitely going for people not liking him, so I’m glad that worked! He was originally just supposed to be sort of whiny and annoying, but one of my betas for Anthem said he seemed manipulative. I went with it.
I ended up going to the library to work, which was perfect. They have a new quiet work/study room with these really cool chair-desk things. I may have to go there all the time!
The “Boyfriend” is… *squinces*
Definitely a powerful scene here. Hopefully Nate will help you work in his part so it stays that way
Yeah, The Boyfriend is not a good person.
So far, Nate’s been much more in control of things than I’d let him be before, so I think this will work much better.
He definitely plans on getting his way whether Jamie wants to or not.
Shalom aleichem,
Patricia