Arts

WIPpet Wednesday: Shopping Trip

Happy Wednesday! It’s been quite a busy few days. School is winding down. My big kid is home, since he only has to show up for exams now. Younger child finishes next week. This weekend is the last recital. I’m so ready for summer break.

I’ve stalled on writing Minuet. It’s complicated, and I’m really struggling to know where my place is in the writing world. Right now, I don’t have clear goals, only half-done projects and old stuff I could work on fixing up. I’m sure it’ll all be fine. I go through this a few times a year, and I somehow manage to work out of my slump.

In the meantime, I’m still working on the untitled Shiny New Thing from last week’s snippet. This should provide a little more context. The story is set in the fall of 1991, and the main character, Noah, has quite a lot on his mind.

WIPmath: 6/13/2018 = 6 + 1 + 3 = 10 sentences

I shake my head. Tomorrow, I’ll go with Toni to the mall. The idea of having my own stuff and not having to sneak it out of my mom’s closet makes my stomach tighten with excitement and nerves. I promise myself I’ll tell Toni the truth, even though I know damn well I won’t offer and she won’t ask.

I sit up and reach over to the nightstand to grab my Walkman. I need something to drown out these thoughts. Everything but Christian music is supposed to be banned in our house since last winter, but I have a stash of cassettes I keep in my drawer. My most recent addition is sitting on top of a strip of condoms I’ll probably never use and a bottle of lime green nail polish. I’m not sure which thing my parents would be most pissed off about.

With my headphones in blasting R.E.M.’s Out of Time, I close my eyes and don’t move again until I hear Mom calling me for dinner.

Like what you read? Be sure to check out the other entries and add your own. Just post a bit of your WIP, connect it to the date, and link up with us. Many thanks to Emily Wrayburn for giving us this space. Happy reading and writing!

But it’s not grammatically correct!

Gender Identity, LGBTQ+, Writing

There are very few subjects I write about that get an immediate and angry response. Some of that is my natural avoidance of politics these days—anyone left still in the dark about my views probably hasn’t known me long. The one topic that gets instant and palpable hate, though?

Use of singular “they.”

No joke. Any time it comes up, there’s at least one person (usually more) who will still cling to, “But I learned in school…” I’m sure they did. I did too. But let’s discuss it, shall we?

If we were talking about whether or not use of singular they was appropriate in a generic context, that might be one thing. Still not wrong, but at least understandable why someone thinks it is, given how anyone over the age of 35 probably had at least one teacher who was a stickler.

That’s not what happens, though. It typically comes up in the context of personal pronouns. Someone says they use they instead of he or she, and within a heartbeat, someone else Has Words about it. These are not usually Nice Words.

I remarked recently that a person isn’t truly respectful if their reply to “My pronouns are they/them” with anything other than “Okay, got it.” You would think I’d accused people of eating babies and kittens for breakfast with how swift the defensive response was. (That’s not unusual, by the way.) If it bothers you, I can’t change that, but you really do need to keep it to yourself if you’re trying to show love and respect.

Inappropriate responses include but are not limited to:

Fine, but it grates on me.
That’s not grammatically correct.
I’m old-school, and we don’t say that where I come from.
But the style guides say it’s wrong.
We should have real gender-neutral pronouns.

Let me answer those:

So? It’s not my job to use the pronouns you prefer.
It’s grammatically just fine and has been used for centuries.
I’m old-school too, and I managed to adapt.
I have access to multiple style guides for work. Allow me to prove you wrong.
We’ve tried neutral pronouns. People complain they’re “too weird.”

Besides being plain rude to speak to anyone that way, there are two specific points I want to elaborate on. First, I work in the publishing industry. I rub shoulders with people at all stages of the process, and there’s a wide range of education among my colleagues. I can assure you that use of singular they is considered appropriate and correct. Most style guides and dictionaries have adapted. The holdout, the Chicago Manual of Style, allows it specifically for use as a personal pronoun. If you’re not in the industry, you simply don’t get to use our references to uphold your view. And if you are in the industry, then perhaps try educating yourself on what’s in those style guides you cling to.

Second, there is no one more indoctrinated into “singular they isn’t grammatically correct” than I am. My parents were more strict about it than my teachers. My parents insisted from the time I could make sound that I do it properly. I mean, my father was the sort to take a pen to a library book if he found something he thought was wrong. One time, he humiliated me in front of my friends. He was giving them a ride home after an event. When he asked how it had gone, I said, “It was so fun!” And he gave me a 5-minute lecture on how I could only say, “It was so much fun” or “It was such fun.” Slang? Not in my household. And forget about singular they—I got corrected more times than I can count.

All of that is to say I was thoroughly immersed in the cult of Grammatical Correctness. I am now in my 40s, and I am happily using singular they as a personal pronoun as well as in many other situations. My kids have never heard the rule, not even at school.

The last thing I will say is to ask, why is that the hill you want to die on? What is so vitally important about clinging to an outdated (and frankly incorrect) rule about singular they? Are there really no other important issues to discuss? Even if it does bother you, why make a fuss about it to the person who is obviously coming out to you about their gender identity?

When someone comes to you and says, “My pronouns are they/them,” that person is coming out to you in the same way any other person in the LGBTQ+ community comes out. That is someone telling you they do not relate to or experience the binary identities of “man” or “woman.” It’s not your turn to question them, even “nicely,” about it. It’s not your chance to go all philosophical about the tragedy of our gendered pronouns or an opportunity to educate anyone on proper grammar. It’s a chance to embrace a person you care about and make the effort to treat them how you would want to be treated.

Either you respect people or you don’t. Slip-ups happen, and using the wrong pronouns while you adjust is normal. But there is absolutely no excuse whatsoever for intentionally shaming someone by playing Language Cop. Do better, folks.

Book Review: Rainbow Romances Anthology

Books, Featured, Reviews

About the Book

Title: Rainbow Romances: charity collection National AIDS Trust

Author: Sarah Beth James, G R Lyons, Amir Lane, Melanie Quinlan, Carmilla Voiez, Mike Ferrante, Marolyn Krasner

Date: June 1, 2018

Length: 284 pages

Categories: Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual Romance

Goodreads

Synopsis

G R Lyons:

Stripped Bare: Though they both work as strippers for the gay nightclub, Matchmakers, Sev is convinced that Ty is out of his league. But that doesn’t stop him from trying to win the little guy’s heart.

Broken Defences: After his work ruined one too many relationships, Beni Thaton has given up on dating, until he meets a very determined new student who pushes all the right buttons.

Michael Ferrante:

Online Casanova: Michael didn’t believe in online dating. But after going through a few bad relationships he decided what’s the worst that can happen? People say you find the one you love when you least expect it. Well, Michael is certainly going to realise that on his journey to love.

Amir Lane:

Far Water: Avery is on her way to Ohio after finally turning 18 and leaving foster care. On the bus, she meets a girl who isn’t what she seems.

Carmilla Voiez:

Something To Hold On To: Jenny is a high-school student who’s in love with her best friend, Lucy. Unfortunately, Lucy likes boys. After numerous failed relationships, will Lucy be willing to redefine her sexuality, and think of Jenny as more than just a friend? Jenny is afraid to make her dreams come true and risk a broken heart.

Melanie Quinlan:

Bedsitter Christmas: Delivers some fluffy M/M romance, set against the harsh backdrop of bedsitter land in 1980s London.

Sarah Beth James:

Until My Dying Day: Francis struggles with moving from the reservation into a normal white city school when his mother falls ill. Dealing with bullying, death, homophobia and abuse before he meets the boy of his dreams in Xander. Who does everything he can to bring a little joy into Francis’s life. Cutting between current day, and their relationship with the past and how they got to be where they are. We follow a painful, yet fulfilling journey of how Francis’s life improved.

Marolyn Krasner:

Selia: Selia is not living her best life. She is young and full of lust for the mail clerk, but she is not doing anything about it. The seeds of her lust start sprouting, forcing Selia to take action to improve her life and seek sexual healing to eradicate the pest threatening her personal ecosystem.

Raising money for the amazing charity: National Aid’s Trust.

Purchase Link

Amazon

Review

Overall, this collection is decent. It’s a quick, easy read with a variety of styles. There’s plenty of romance, but only a couple of these ended up feeling like they fit strictly within the romance genre. On my part, that’s not a complaint. I tend to like those kinds of stories. For someone looking for very clear romance, they might end up a little disappointed.

On the whole, I thought the lesbian/FF stories were superior to the gay/MM stories. It could be my own personal preference, but there are some common factors. A lot of the gay stories seemed to focus on abuse, trauma, and/or beating, which was hard for me to read. The lesbian stories, on the other hand, emphasized queer joy and awakening to self, which was a pleasure to read.

The other thing that surprised me is that this was for an AIDS charity, but there isn’t even one story that includes HIV+ characters, not even the one set in the 1980s. It seems like that’s still an off-limits subject for a romance story, sadly.

The anthology is worth picking up in order to support the charity. Different stories may appeal to different people, but we can all agree that it’s for a good cause.

Total rating: 7/10 fountain pens

Individual reviews:

Stripped Bare, G R Lyons: This was okay. Cute, fluffy, maybe a bit over the top on the hurt/comfort angle. That’s not my thing, but it is for a lot of other people. Ty read as babyish to me, and I’m not sure there was quite enough space to deal with his mental health issues in such a short span. But it was very sweet and the writing was decent. 6/10 fountain pens

Broken Defences, G R Lyons: This one, too, was a sort of hurt/comfort story. I was somewhat put off by all the posturing and the immature way they talked about sex. There was some weird stuff about gay stereotypes as well. Both this one and the previous one are set in the same world as the author’s novels, so I might be missing something from not having read them. But I suspect the author’s work just may not be for me. 4/10 fountain pens

Online Casanova, Michael Ferrante: I liked this one a lot. I don’t know if it’s actually the author’s memoir or if it’s a fictionalize account or what, but I loved the personal feel to it. It’s very relatable to anyone who has been on a search for Mx. Right. My only issue was that it needed some tighter editing to eliminate the constant run-on sentences. 8/10 fountain pens

Far Water, Amir Lane: This is a great story. It drew me right in and held me until the end. I can’t say much because I don’t want to give spoilers. Not a traditional romance but certainly captivating. 8/10 fountain pens

Something To Hold On To, Carmilla Voiez: A very sweet young adult romance with a true happily ever after. Another relatable story for anyone who has harbored a crush on a best friend. 6/10 fountain pens

Bedsitter Christmas, Melanie Quinlan: This is a cute holiday romance. I have to admit, I was a bit put off by the violence in one section of this. I had the same problem with the main character as in one of the other stories being really immature and not in an endearing way. Still, the story itself is cute and offers a hopeful ending. 6/10 fountain pens

Until My Dying Day, Sarah Beth James: This is the longest story in the anthology, which also means it’s one of the best developed. It wasn’t bad, though I’m not entirely sure the author captured the US educational system. I wasn’t clear on how the setting and characters were chosen. I can’t really speak to whether this story is good representation, as I’m not Native myself, so I can’t critique that aspect, though it did hit me a bit funny. I did like that it has a happy ending, and I think it’s good for young people to see that even after a difficult life, hope and joy are still possible. 6/10 fountain pens

Selia, Marolyn Krasner: This is easily the best story in the anthology. Not only is the writing incredible, the story’s concept is unique. It’s more literary than romance, which is fine by me. The main character’s feelings were so familiar and easy to relate to. The end made me cry, not out of sadness but out of a sense the main character had triumphed. Every woman should read this story regardless of her orientation. 10/10 fountain pens

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WIPpet Wednesday: A shiny new thing

Books, Writing

Happy Wednesday! I’m late with this because I had to take my kid to an appointment this morning and then attend the music awards at his school this afternoon. I’m one proud mama bear. He earned his varsity music letter as a freshman, only the second kid in his school’s (short) history to do so.

I sent a novella for an anthology, and it was a bit of a difficult decision. I’d considered making it longer, a full-length novel. But several readers looked at it, and one of the suggestions made by more than one was to do a series of novellas about the ensemble cast.

Today, I put a few words down. This is just about all I have so far, but I’ve already started planning it. I knew I had to choose this character next for a number of reasons. Anyway, you don’t need the context of the original story to understand this other than that it’s not quite contemporary–it’s set in the fall of 1991.

No WIPmath today; first Wednesday of the month, first few paragraphs of the new story.

I call my friend Toni on Sunday afternoon. We were only just at church an hour ago, but she’s the only one I can talk to. Or maybe she’s the only one who can talk some sense into me.

Her sister answers on the third ring then hollers for Toni as soon as I ask for her. Sofia must have the receiver uncovered because I can hear Toni in the background saying she’ll get the phone in her parents’ room. I cross and uncross my fingers, praying Sofia hangs up as soon as Toni is on the line. I don’t want anyone else to hear what I’ve got to say.

“Hey, Noah.” There’s a pause, then a muffled, “I got it!” followed by a click. “Okay. What’s up?”

I jump right into it before I can chicken out. “Wanna go shopping with me?”

“No, but I will. What do you need?”

“Um.” I clear my throat. “I need to get some stuff from the girls’ section. It’s for…a play. The community theater,” I add hastily.

“Seriously? What role is it, Tootsie?” She giggles.

It isn’t, really, but Toni’s given me a good out. I swallow. I’m not ready to tell anyone, not even her, the real reason. Mostly because I need to figure out what the real reason is myself. I do the next best thing and lie through my teeth. “Yeah. They…uh…made it into a play, and I have the lead.”

Toni snorts. “I sincerely doubt they’d give Dustin Hoffman’s role to a kid. Wasn’t the main character kind of old?”

“No, really!” I charge on. “They…rewrote it for, like, high school. And…uh…only kids are in it.”

Now Toni laughs. “C’mon, Noah. Tell me the truth.”

“I swear, I’m being honest!”

Toni knows at least thirty percent of what I’ve said is genuine. I did join the community theater, to which Toni said, “That’s why you can’t go out for breakfast at Bruegger’s Bagels on Saturday mornings? I thought it was for soccer.” I told her it was both, which is sort of true. I’m giving her a partial-truth now, too.

Rainbow Snippets: The Letters

Books, Writing

Happy Saturday! Hope all is well with everyone. Our trip last weekend was wonderful. It’s hard to believe it’s already been a full 7 days since we first met some dear friends and colleagues in person for the first time.

Before I get to my snippet, I have a maybe odd request. I have to make a decision about a story that’s currently a 25k novella. I can either leave it as-is and include it in an upcoming anthology, or I can make it a full-length novel. The publisher is okay with either, but I’m finding the decision impossible. It’s not even remotely a romance; it’s YA set in the early 1990s. If anyone wants to have a look, let me know. I do NOT need a full beta read, just a more objective opinion on whether to make it longer or not.

My snippet is still from Keeping the Faith. I doubt it will actually win at the Bisexual Book Awards, but I’m thrilled just to have it be a finalist. This is probably the novel I’m most proud of. It’s a very personal story, and it’s amazing to have my hard work recognized in any sense.

In this snippet, Micha’s found some letters written by his dead spouse in the months before his death. He’s opening the first one.

Micah opened the first letter. Inside, he found the key to the lock box and a folded piece of paper. He withdrew both and set the key on top of the box. Slowly, he unfolded the letter and read the greeting. He only got as far as Dearest Micah when he let the paper fall from his fingers. His immediate urge was to shove it back into the envelope and never open it again nor any of the others.

Rainbow Snippets is a safe and welcoming space for LGBTQIA+ authors, readers, and bloggers to share 6 sentences each week from a work of fiction—published or in-progress—or a book recommendation. Feel free to join in!